The art of doing...nothing!

"Nothing" has gotten a bad rap. For instance, when there is an unnerving silence upstairs where the kids are playing you call up to them, "What's going on up there?" , "Nothing," they answer, which you know means anything but! Or for you guys, when your wife keeps slamming dishes around in the kitchen, you ask, "What's wrong?" and she answers "Nothing!" (Which, unless you are a complete idiot means that something is in fact wrong, and you should probably find a flower/jewelry shop soon!)

The concept of "nothing" is difficult to fathom, especially for one of my training, which has been taught to view ideas such as "zero" and "infinity" as actual things, not just abstract concepts. I can't help but be reminded of a movie, The Neverending Story, (which, by the way, everyone should see!) in which they said it all:
"I was looking for (something, I can't remember exactly) and instead found...nothing."
"You mean there was a hole?"
"A hole would be something, but this was nothing!"

For whatever reason, that line spoke to me, and I have carried such a "definition" to this day. When I ask people what they are doing, sometimes they say "nothing". And I have to disagree.

Many people say that watching TV is doing "nothing". That hanging around the house is doing "nothing", or that eating lunch is doing "nothing". My point is, people are never doing "nothing".

And yet there is something to be said for sitting and not doing anything else. (Notice, I don't refer to this as nothing because I believe that if you are alive, you are doing something!) In fact, there was a quote,(I can't remember the author, but if anyone knows, please comment because I would like to credit him or her!) that said, "In my opinion, the definition of a well ordered mind is someone who can stop and just enjoy a few minutes in his own company." To me this means someone who can sit, really just sit, and not do anything else. Seriously, try it! Set a timer for five minutes and just sit there, thinking, for that time. It really is powerful. I once heard of a church minister who, instead of giving a sermon one Sunday, asked the parishioners to observe "five minutes of silence". At first, people were looking around, and babies were fussing, but after a few minutes, the people really started to hear their own voice, and several of them started to cry. Apparently they hadn't heard it for awhile.

Which brings me to the definition of "introverted" and "extroverted". If you were to ask any of my childhood friends, they would all tell you that I am an "extrovert". What they meant was, that I enjoyed being the center of attention, and also enjoyed the theater arts. That I put myself out there for others to see. But that isn't what "extrovert" means at all! I discovered that I was an "introvert" when I was in college, taking a communications class. An introvert is someone who needs to be alone to "re-charge" their energy, and multitudes of people actually deplete energy from these people. An extrovert is someone who needs to be with people to "re-charge" and they can't stand to be alone for very long. During my childhood, I would spend every Saturday morning playing, by myself, with my toys. At big family gatherings, my mother would notice my absence and find me behind the couch, building with blocks all by myself. The point is, I needed this time alone. That my alone time keeps me sane. And yet, I have friends for whom the term "alone" is something that scares them. They need people.

I don't want to say that my way is the best way, but I need my alone time, and yet I seek out the company of others. I only hope that others who need people will occasionally seek out their own company, if just for a little while. There is something to find, when all the chaos and lists and daily chores have had their time, and all that is left is your conscience and desires. I encourage you to seek it. For just when you think you are doing "nothing" do you discover yourself. And sometimes, you don't even recognize her.